It's time for another edition of Glowy Box Mailbag, where you ask Google questions, Google sends you our way, and we finally get around to answering them. Or mocking you. Either way.
Q: is janice's modeling agency real
A: Great question! Unfortunately, it brings us into a bit of an existential dilemma. What is "real," really? The "agency" has a myspace page. Does that make it real? Said myspace page includes an address where wannabe models can send headshots, which is promising. Of course, the address is for the production office, and not the agency. Hmm. However, the page also has this to say about Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency: "Unlike many 'reality' shows, there are no fake contests or contrived situations. It..s [sic] a real business with real financial, personal and professional stakes." I'm guessing the "Suck it, Tyra!" is implied there.
I suppose her agency is "real" in that she had to set up a real agency for the show to exist. Would there be an agency without the show? Almost certainly not. I leave you with this quote from Albert Einstein: "Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." ...Does that help?
Q: what haven't the "cash and treasures" crew gone looking for
A: Um...ancient Freemason treasure, the spare change lodged in my couch cushions, and the gold at the end of the rainbow? It definitely seems like they've gone looking for just about everything on Cash and Treasures (including old bottles and fluorescent minerals). However, the second season just started on the Travel Channel (with Kirsten Gum as the new host, since Becky Worley is out pregnant), and they've already come up with Herkimer Diamonds, Emeralds, Agates, and Turquoise, so maybe there is some new treasure under the sun for Cash and Treasures. And hopefully some of it not gem-related. (For the uninitiated, this surprisingly addictive show is on Tuesdays at 9 PM on the Travel Channel.)
Q: where does paul adelstein live?
A: Creepy, much? I'm going to assume he lives in LA, where Private Practice films. And I'm going to remind you that stalking is illegal in California.
That's it for this edition of the Mailbag! Keep on googling, and I'll keep on occasionally answering! (And I know it wasn't technically a question, but for the two of you who got to Glowy Box by googling extreme underground catfights...well...I'm sorry to have disappointed you, though I recommend checking out my Top Model recaps.)
Monday, December 17, 2007
Glowy Box Mailbag: Janice, Treasure, and One Potential Stalker
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Glowy Box Mailbag: It's back, baby!
Welcome back to the Glowy Box Mailbag! For those who don’t remember its brief existence many months ago, the Mailbag is a chance for Glowy Box to give back to you, the readers who randomly stumbled here from Google.
You see, Sitemeter gives us the referral links that brought you to Glowy Box. For Google users, this means we get to see what search term you used that led you to us, creepily enough. And it seems some Google searchers choose to actually type full questions in, instead of just keywords or search terms, as if they’re posing the questions to the Internet at Large. Which I find highly amusing. The Mailbag is all about answering those questions, because I’m nothing if not helpful, and we live to serve here at Glowy Box.
Q: What is up with the Dylan thing on Desperate Housewives
A: What IS up with the Dylan thing?! At first it seemed really important, but now it’s on the sidelines compared to whatever the heck happened in Chicago (another popular question, incidentally). We don’t know much, aside from the vague “a bad thing happened in this room” and “Dylan has no memory” stuff. But that’s not really a good answer, so I’ll start a reckless rumor: Katherine and Aunt Lily sold the real Dylan into white slavery years ago, and the current “Dylan” is an android that Katherine commissioned to deflect suspicion when they moved back to Wisteria Lane. Hence, no memory. (Yeah, I just saw Blade Runner again…what of it?)
Q: who played the earless boy on grey’s anatomy
A: Great question! That kid was all kinds of adorable and charismatic. And it’s a good thing, since trick-or-treating for ears could be seriously weird otherwise. Ryan was played by 10-year-old Dylan Minnette, who has also had parts on Saving Grace and Prison Break.
Q: WHO IS BETTINAS FATHER THE PROFESSOR
Q: why would brad womack pick bettina after her parents treated him so badly
A: Ah, a pair of Bachelor questions. If Google is to be believed, there are a lot of you out there who are curious about Bettina’s dad. According to the Washington Post, Bettina’s father is an architect in DC’s ritzy Georgetown neighborhood. According to Google, he used to be an Assistant Professor at the University of Maryland School of Architecture. And according to me, he’s kind of a jerk. As to why Brad still picked Bettina, I’d say he wanted the relationship to end on his terms, not hers. She and her family essentially rejected him, and his ego just wouldn’t let it go down like that. If you ask me, he’s keeping her around for another week so that he can reject her.
That’s all for this week…keep on Googling!
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Glowy Box Mailbag: Back by Popular Demand!
It’s that time again…time for the Glowy Box Mailbag! You ask Google questions, and Google sends you here, where we answer them belatedly. So without further ado, your best questions to Google this week:
Q: will veronica and logan get back together
A: As usual, my psychic powers are on the fritz, but my Magic 8-Ball says, “Why don’t you just keep watching the show and find out for yourself, buddy?”
Q: desperate housewives what happened Kayla
A: Great question! I’m guessing that Lynette realized a few weeks ago that Kayla is a total psychopath, and had her shipped off to an institution of some sort. Possibly the one where Paul kept Zach all drugged up and harmless those many seasons ago.
Q: what happened to JD’s baby in scrubs
A: First off, shame on you for not watching and finding out for yourself! However, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you had a hot date that night, and an unexpected power surge shorted out your DVR. Essentially, Kim lied to JD and told him that she had a miscarriage in order to see if they were just together because of her pregnancy. Turns out, they were. But unbeknownst to JD, Kim is still pregnant with his child! (Dum dum DUUUUM…)
Q: who sings the theme song for america’s next top model
A: According to Wikipedia, the “Wanna Be on Top” theme song is sung by none other than Miss Tyra Banks herself (and produced by Rodney Jerkins). Who knew?!
Q: why did matt and ashley break up
A: Hmm. That’s a toughie. I honestly have no clue who Matt and Ashley are, but I’m going to guess they broke up because he’s just not that into her. Or because he slept with her high school enemy (or maybe that hot copy girl) while they were on a break. Or because she wanted to go to LA for the summer to study art. Or because a crazy dentist ran over him and he lost his memory. The possibilities are endless!
That’s it for this week’s installment of the Glowy Box Mailbag. Thanks for asking Google!
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Glowy Box Mailbag
We may not receive much mail here at Glowy Box HQ (and we certainly don’t receive enough hot nekkid pictures), but we do get quite a few Google referrals. And sometimes, those referrals come in the form of a question. Since people typing actual questions into search engines cracks me up (“O mighty Google, who will win Dancing with the Stars?”), and since I desire nothing more than being helpful to our readership, I decided to answer some of those Google-referred questions. Thus, our inaugural Glowy Box Mailbag, from the best five questions posed in the last two days:
Q: what episode does Turk Donald Faison dances Poison
A: I give you a D+ for grammar, but an A+ for taste. That Poison dance is pretty much the Greatest Thing Ever. You can find it in the episode “My Half-Acre,” (episode nine of season five) or online here.
Q: who played hannah on House on last nights episode
A: Now that’s just lazy Googling—haven’t you ever heard of IMDB? I’m going to help you help yourself here, because if you teach a person to fish, he or she will never come back asking easily-answered questions again. Step one: Go to imdb.com. Step two: Search for House. Step three: Go to the latest episode’s cast listing. Step four: Profit.
Q: grey’s does izzy save the guy under the car
A: Ah, see, this is an example of using Google as some sort of oracle, rather than as a source for actual information. I’m not sure my psychic powers are completely tuned up today, but let me give it a shot: She doesn’t save the completely crushed, practically dead guy under the car, but ends up learning a valuable lesson about life and death. And yet, somehow, his friends aren’t consoled by that fact.
Q: what kind of purse does veronica mars carry
A: A brown one? Sorry, I don’t really know fashion.
Q: is austin from grease gay
A: I’m actually getting more of a “creepy child molester” vibe than a gay vibe, but that could just be me... Also, I really hope you aren’t asking because you’re actually buying into that “Hot Danny” stuff, because like I said: CREEPY.
That’s it for this Mailbag…thanks for all the great questions and I’m sorry I don’t have psychic powers, random Google searchers!
