Watched Over the Weekend:
Chuck: Though I was happy that they moved the plot along and broke out of the typical formula, I was a bit disappointed to lose Bryce as the mysterious dead potential villain. Now that we know he's definitely a nice guy, though, I'm even more interested to see why he stole the Intersect!
How I Met Your Mother: Well...I'm glad Lily and Marshall aren't getting divorced. I don't have that much more to say about this episode. "Dowisetrepla" had a pretty funny payoff, and there were a few great lines...but none that will go down in history, I'd say.
Samantha Who?: Aaaand, that's it. I've given it a chance, and I just don't happen to find it as funny as the rest of America does. Sorry!
Reaper: Okay, what happened with Sam's dad being mysterious and stealing a page out of the contract? We haven't even seen his parents since! That said, I did enjoy the episode. I think my brain has just settled into "enjoy the mindless fun" mode with this show, rather than trying to make it more than it is. Which is definitely what needed to happen for me to keep watching.
House: A House-ku:
Chase and Cameron
Need to be part of the show
Not squeezed into plots
Boston Legal: I'm not sure why William Shatner farting and then saying, "Denny Crane" is so hilarious, but it totally, totally is. Does anyone else feel like Alan's closing statements at trials are getting a little out of control? I realize that these long speeches have proven Emmy results, but I'm starting to find myself checking email during them. Just sayin'.
Life: Is anyone else out there watching this show? Because I'm totally addicted at this point.
Ugly Betty: Amanda is one of the most underrated characters on television. Period.
30 Rock: As much as I hated Ross on Friends, I loved Greenzo on 30 Rock. Just like the episode on integrated advertising, last week's 30 Rock managed to take an NBC directive and obey it by mocking it openly. Also, Al Gore is my hero. "A whale is in trouble!"
The Office: I'm just going to breathe a big sigh of relief here that The Office is back to its regular half-hour episodes. PHEW.
Scrubs: I empathize with the Janitor--I can't get my coworkers to recycle properly, either. Maybe I should make myself a sash with a bunch of environmental buttons. Also, the sight of Turk's head painted like a basketball was way, way funnier than it should have been. So funny!
Desperate Housewives: Quality stuff. Read my complete thoughts here.
Will Watch or DVR Tonight:
How I Met Your Mother: When Ted thinks he has met a wonderful woman, the gang points out a deal-breaking flaw. CBS, 8 PM.
Chuck: Chuck meets a pretty woman (Rachel Bilson) who is interested in the real him; he and Sarah double-date with Ellie and Captain Awesome; a poison specialist tries to obtain codes to nuclear facilities. NBC, 8 PM.
Heroes: The calendar turns back four months, and Nathan must pay a terrible price for his heroic deeds; D.L. sacrifices for Nikki and Micah; Maya manifests her dark powers for the first time. NBC, 9 PM.
The Bachelor: Bachelorettes return to confront one another and Brad one last time; reluctant Brad must answer questions from heartbroken Hillary; Sarah and Lindsay explain why they could not tell the difference between Brad and Chad; a preview of the final episode. ABC, 10 PM.
Here's hoping I can actually stay caught up this week!
Monday, November 12, 2007
On the Glowy Box: Catching Up is Hard to Do
Friday, November 02, 2007
On the Glowy Box: Defying Gravity
And in a surprise to no one but a downer for everyone, there's going to be a strike unless the producers do some extreme last-minute compromising. Nuts.
Watched Last Night:
Ugly Betty: Broadway musical + already-awesome TV show + smiling pickle logo = too much greatness for mere mortals to behold. Seriously, this show just keeps getting more fantastic. In its unusual, over-the-top-yet-still-nerdy way. I've had "Defying Gravity" stuck in my head all morning, but it was worth it for last night's fantastic episode. Marc's atypical boyfriend gives his character a little depth, which is a nice counterpart to Amanda's newfound depth. I like the idea of Daniel looking out for Betty for once, even if he's getting in the way of the greatest couple on television. And Hilda's reaction to Betty's secret relationship with Henry was a great moment in that I didn't expect it, but it fit perfectly with her character. You know, I realize the cast, styling, concept, and comedy of this show get a lot of credit, but the overall writing (drama and everything) is absolutely what makes Ugly Betty work so well. (Yeah, I'm trying not to think of the strike. And it's just not working.)
Grey's Anatomy: Get over your crap already, Meredith! Read my full review here.
Scrubs: The idea of JD as a father is both terrifying and hilarious. But mostly terrifying. Read the rest of my thoughts here.
Will Watch or DVR this Weekend:
Women's Murder Club: The club investigates a drug ring being run out of a nursing home; Lindsay reluctantly accepts an invitation for a date; Jill takes a big step in her romantic life. ABC, 9 PM.
The Amazing Race: The teams begin their worldwide journey at the Playboy Mansion in Beverly Hills, Calif. CBC, 8 PM.
The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror! Homer, living a double life as a secret agent, must kill Kent Brockman; Bart and Lisa help Kodos reconnect with his home planet; Flanders decides to spook Springfield's children. Fox, 8 PM.
Desperate Housewives: Carlos walks out on his relationship with Edie; Susan finds Mike's supposedly dead father; an unexpected delivery at a Halloween party surprises the neighborhood. ABC, 9 PM.
More to watch this weekend than usual. Rock.
Monday, October 29, 2007
On the Glowy Box: Yay for Halloween-themed episodes!
Congratulations to Dirty Sexy Money and Reaper for the extra script orders!
Watched Over the Weekend:
Desperate Housewives: Loved it! Read my complete thoughts here.
Women's Murder Club: I have to say, this show was perfect rainy Friday night material. Not season pass material, not Sunday-Thursday material, but exactly what I'm in the mood for after a long week of work and don't want to have to think too much. That said, I really hope they get off this ex-husband/boss plot for Angie Harmon's character. It's lame.
The Office: From Thursday. 1) The folks who were recording the theme song totally need to form an office a capella group, like Ted on Scrubs. It would be hilarious. 2) Um, their final commercial was a LOT better than I expected, given that Michael Scott (formerly of "Lazy Scranton") was directing it. Nice. 3) I'm so glad the show is back to its half-hour format. And not just because it leaves room for Scrubs in the schedule.
Ugly Betty: From Thursday. Yay, Betty/Henry! Yay, Justin back to his usual self! Yay, Alexis getting her memory back! Yay, new mysterious background for Christina! Yay, Ugly Betty!!! Here's hoping this year's Halloween episode lives up to last year's...
Dirty Sexy Money: From Wednesday. This is one of those shows that I get totally into while it's on, and then forget about until the weekend, when I make myself watch it so that I can delete if off my DVR. And I get totally into it again! What's up with that? I think, clearly, this is a show that's meant to be watched on DVD, marathon-style. Also, I kind of can't take this "Tripp is evil! No, Simon Elder is evil! No wait, it's totally Tripp! For reals this time! Except maybe not!" flipping around. I need someone to hate!
Reaper: From Tuesday. Though I find Reaper entertaining enough to watch on the weekends, I feel like this show, more than any other, didn't live up to its awesome pilot. I'm not sure if it's the writing, the CW's extremely budget special effects (Smallville- and Charmed-style), the formulaic nature of the plots, or the acting. Seriously, I really wish it didn't feel like the big sidekick (Sock?) was doing a Jack Black impersonation every single moment of every single episode. However, I am intrigued by Sam's Dad's new shady behavior. So at least there's something to keep me DVRing every week.
Will Watch or DVR Tonight:
(Descriptions from Zap2it.com's TV listings)
How I Met Your Mother: Marshall gives up his dream of saving the Earth in favor of money after being courted by a lawyer (John Cho) from a corporate firm. CBS, 8 PM.
Chuck: Chuck runs into a fellow agent, who is living a similar life, and must decide whether to turn the agent in to Sarah and Casey; Morgan's and Chuck's Halloweens differ. NBC, 8 PM.
Samantha Who?: Sam assumes her role as a bridesmaid at a friend's wedding, but upon arriving, she learns that the friend does not want her there. ABC, 9:30 PM.
The Bachelor: The final four bachelorettes take Brad to their hometowns to meet their families; one woman's protective father confronts Brad, leading to an argument; Brad makes a difficult decision and sends one woman home. ABC, 10 PM.
I demand more Halloween episodes!
Monday, October 22, 2007
On the Glowy Box: Blerg.
So I totally watched, oh, a zillion hours of 30 Rock this weekend. Yay, first season DVDs!
Watched Over the Weekend:
Desperate Housewives: Crabs are funny. Read my full review here.
Private Practice: From Wednesday. Yeah, this show has officially sucked me in and isn't letting go. I can't tell if it's actually getting better and more interesting, or if that's just the addiction talking. But man, I was really feeling for Addison when no one RSVP'd to her party. That's rough! (And no, I'm not even being sarcastic. That totally sucks.)
Ugly Betty: From Thursday. What a great episode! Ugly Betty does a great job being beautifully over-the-top, while still maintaining enough humanity for us to care for the characters. Bad-Ass Justin is such a real, heartbreaking response to his dad dying, but is still carried off in an entertaining way(Justin/young hoochie). I found Betty's mistaken writing class thievery to be a bit too cringy to watch, though, perhaps because Victor Garber terrifies me, much as I do love him. Also, "Ugly Willie" = Best Ever.
30 Rock: From Thursday. First off, yay, Steve Buscemi! Also, yay, "Vic Nightingale." Cookie jars are innately hilarious. And I totally think Dot-com should write TGS from now on, by the way. My favorite quote of the episode had to be, "You can't ask a bird not to fly. You can't ask a fish not to swim. You can't ask a tiger not to turn back into a Chinese dude at midnight!"
Viva Laughlin: From Thursday. More on this after I've seen last night's episode, but essentially, this show is a tragic waste of money, talent, and concept. And for the love of God, WHY on EARTH would they have the talent sing over the original vocals on the songs? WHY?!
Will Watch or DVR Tonight:
(Descriptions from Zap2it.com's TV listings)
How I Met Your Mother: Ted's new girl is jealous because the story of how Ted met his friends is better than the story of how he met her. CBS, 8 PM.
Chuck: Chuck must decide if he should go against the U.S. government and his friends by helping a top Chinese spy with an unauthorized mission; Buy More forces Morgan into a sales competition that could cost him his job. NBC, 8 PM.
Heroes: In Ireland, a lost hero discovers that a mysterious woman (Kristen Bell!) is willing to kill to find him; Matt and an unexpected ally fly to Philadelphia to hunt down the "boogeyman"; Monica tries to come to terms with her new abilities. NBC, 9 PM.
Samantha Who?: Samantha discovers what she does for a living and tries to diverge from her old workaholic lifestyle. ABC, 9:30 PM.
The Bachelor: Brad takes one woman on a romantic gondola ride; four bachelorettes go to a pool party; one of the women gets a one-on-one date at a mansion; emotions run high at the cocktail party; Brad cuts two more women, one of whom makes an emotional exit. ABC, 10 PM.
I'm so behind on TV at this point that I may need to burn my DVR and start a new life for myself in a country with only two TV channels. We'll see. I blame the 30 Rock DVDs.
Monday, October 15, 2007
On the Glowy Box: Pardon the dust...
In case you hadn't noticed, I'm tinkering around with the site a bit. So if things are looking screwy on your browser, or something isn't working right (which is almost a certainty given my lack of web design skills), please let me know and I'll try to fix the problem. And check out the new "expand post" feature after the "Watched this Weekend" section--it should expand to show the rest of the post on this page, and then disappear again if you click "summary only." ("Should" and "will" are two different things, though, so lemme know if you have an issue.)
Watched this Weekend:
Women's Murder Club: Much as it pains me to admit it, this show is some quality Friday night viewing. I didn't like the pilot at all when I first watched it, but having finally seen the show at the proper time (Friday night, when I'm exhausted from the work week and just want to watch something mindless and quasi-entertaining), I'm changing my tune. Not something I'd recommend that anyone else watch, not something I'd even call decent television, but it was just what the doctor ordered last Friday, so who am I to complain?
Life is Wild: I didn't even make it past the second act. Ugh. I'm not going to bother getting into how obnoxious I'm finding this show. Suffice to say it's not even funny obnoxious, like Seventh Heaven. Just plain unwatchable, for me at least.
Desperate Housewives: I actually really enjoyed last night's episode. Read my full review here.
Private Practice: From Wednesday. Um...yeah. This show just isn't that good. And isn't really improving. And yet, somehow, I can't seem to cut the LVAD wire. The cast is so good, you guys! And I used to love Addison's character! What happened? Okay, that's actually an easy one to answer. Really terrible writing happened. Cake and obsessing over an ex-boyfriend's phone message? Really? If it weren't actually written by a woman, I'd assume this show was written by some dude who decided to throw a ton of female stereotypes against a wall and see what stuck, rather than actually trying to write real characters.
Life: Second and third episodes. You know, I'm actually enjoying this one. It's not mandatory viewing, but I like the characters so far, I like that you don't have to watch every single week, and I'm interested to see where the story's headed. My only complaint is the same as my problem with the pilot episode--what's with the random documentary-style interviews? I get that they're great for exposition, but I feel like I need to know a bit more about who's doing the interviewing, and why, for it to really fit with the rest of the show. Unless that's part of the mystery, or something...
Ugly Betty: From Thursday. I didn't even know it was possible to get drunk off of wine coolers outside of high school. Learn something new every day! I'm totally not on board with Gio, though. Henry/Betty 4ever!!!1 Also, he's really self-righteous and annoying. Amanda and Marc, though, are just getting better and better. I vote that they get spun off into a detective show, with Tim Gunn playing their mysterious boss. And dude, Ignacio had BETTER really be back. I don't want any of that "it was all a dream!" crap this time.
Dirty Sexy Money: From Wednesday. I'm totally getting into this show. My favorite character is definitely Juliet, though I love Brian, the crazy priest, as well. My only complaints are that the central mystery about the plane crash isn't grabbing me yet (though I expect it to once Blair Underwood shows up!), and that Patrick's drunken "ahh, sweet nectar" speech at the bar was laughably bad. Enough so that it had to have been a joint acting-writing issue. Otherwise, this show is only getting better!
America's Most Smartest Model: This may be one of the funniest things I've ever seen on television. I know I say that a lot, but seriously? Wow. It almost seems mean. And yet, extraordinarily awesome. In a "created by an evil genius" way. Like having a trivia contest where with every question you answer right, you win an item to wear in a photo shoot. (Thus, if you're too dumb to get many right, you could end up naked.) Amazing. This show is prime VH1 marathon fodder, so once it builds up some more episodes, I'd set aside a Sunday afternoon.
Will Watch or DVR Tonight:
(Descriptions from Zap2it.com's TV listings)
How I Met Your Mother: When Robin begins to date a single dad, she ends up bonding with his young son. CBS, 8 PM.
Chuck: Chuck helps to steal a $1 million diamond, which is being used to fund a terrorist group. NBC, 8 PM.
Heroes: A new hero emerges in New Orleans; Angela Petrelli makes a shocking confession as new information about the heroes is revealed; Maya and Alejandro make a grim discovery. NBC, 9 PM.
Samantha Who?: Samantha awakens in the hospital, surrounded by family and friends, but she has no idea who they are or who she is. ABC, 9:30 PM.
The Bachelor: Three must leave; Brad takes one lucky woman on a helicopter ride; six spend a day at a comedy club; he takes two on a date, but one goes home in tears. ABC, 10 PM.
I'm actually pretty excited for Chuck. If they can keep up the pace, that show will be a favorite of mine in no time!
Monday, October 08, 2007
On the Glowy Box: 3-day weekends rock!
Small confession: I didn't watch much TV this weekend.
Watched this Weekend:
Ugly Betty: From Thursday. I could watch this show all the live long day. It's got the perfect combination of humor, loveable and love-to-hate-able characters, and drama both moving and over the top. I love Justin as an intern at Mode, and I'm thrilled to see Henry back in the picture again. (Yes, partly so I can gaze at him dreamily. Shut up.) I'm so scared for Betty's dad, though! Oh, and I really, really want a roof full of smashable mannequins. That looked incredibly therapeutic to me.
Will Watch or DVR Tonight:
(Descriptions from Zap2it.com's TV listings)
How I Met Your Mother: Two beautiful women show Ted that they are very attracted to him; the gang helps Ted realize that bad luck does not always come in threes. CBS, 8 PM.
Chuck: Chuck needs the help of Morgan and the Nerd Herd to prove that he is ready to become the store's assistant manager; Sara and John force Chuck to go under cover for his first real spy mission. NBC, 8 PM.
Heroes: Upon his return to New York, Suresh finds a previously undiscovered painting that foretells the death of someone close to him; Claire and H.R.G. pursue their own agendas; Maya uses her deadly abilities to free Alejandro from a Mexican prison. NBC, 9 PM.
The Bachelor: Brad takes six of the bachelorettes to the circus; one of the women wears many jewels on a one-on-one date in San Francisco; Brad asks his identical twin brother for some assistance. ABC, 9:30 PM.
And it's back to the grind... And by "grind," I mean totally awesome (and occasionally trashy) TV goodness. I love fall!
Friday, May 18, 2007
Ugly Betty: It Ain't Over 'Til the Cute Kid Sings
I am telling you, this show is Broadway-crazy. They make the Sondheim title-poaching Desperate Housewives staff look like dilettantes. There are musicals all over this episode, from the guest appearance of Kristin Chenoweth as the world's perkiest hygienist to Justin's starring appearance in West Side Story, and I'm pleased to say that Mark Indelicato is really quite a good singer. So when he sings "Something's Coming" over the final montage, it's rather sweet. I mean the singing, not the stuff that it's over. And another cast member gets to sing in this episode: Vanessa Williams performs "The Way We Were" over a touching montage of Marc and Wilhelmina moments. So how long do you suppose it'll be until they actually do a musical episode? Half a season?
Ah, but you probably want to know what actually happens, since it's the season finale and all. Here we go: Wilhelmina briefly trades Marc to Fabia in exchange for a cathedral booking for her wedding, but decides she can't do without her minion. A good thing, too, because Fabia tests her products on Marc, and I can't support that kind of cruelty to Marc. Claire breaks out of prison, because she's finally found a posse of bad girls just like her. Christina and Amanda get locked in Fey's love dungeon, and discover a birth certificate that says that Fey is Amanda's mom. What about her dad, though? I mean, it couldn't be Bradford. Not with the thing she and Daniel have going on. …Right? Speaking of Daniel, he has a bit of a breakdown and takes a bunch of pills and booze. But as Alexis is taking him for help along a dark, twisty road, she discovers that the brake line has been cut. It's her own fault for taking that twisty road, and for hiring that guy to take out her dad without warning her not to use her dad's car. Henry's finally broken up with Charlie, and he and Betty make plans for their first date, which Charlie ruins. Because she's pregnant. Henry, being the good guy we love, goes back to Tucson with her, but Betty and Kristin Chenoweth figure out that Charlie's been secretly dating Dr. Farkus – remember him? – and that the kid may be his. Hey, as long as it gets Henry back for next season. But please, please, no more of those longing looks. And finally, Santos is killed in a convenience store robbery. I was always perfectly ambivalent about Santos, but Ana Ortiz sells the hell out of the final scene, and yeah, I was crying. Damn you, Ugly Betty, for having to end on such a sad, sad note. I didn't even care about Santos!
Monday, May 14, 2007
Does That Include the Headgear?
This Yahoo! news story will first make you go, "Huh?", then make you go, "Aww", and then (yes, you'll be riding a rollercoaster of emotions) make you appreciate the transformation America Ferrera undertakes every time she goes on set. Hey, if the Oscars love to reward women who ugg themselves up for a role, does that mean the Emmys might like to as well?
Friday, May 11, 2007
Ugly Betty: ¡Vamos a México!
The Suarezes head down to Guadalajara this week, and while there is precious little Justin to show for it, there is Rita Moreno. Because this show is all about the Broadway stars. But then it all turns a little weird, when Betty is told by a healer that she'll never be happy until she finds a tree with missing branches. Betty thinks this means her family tree, since she doesn't know anything about her mother's family, and sets off to find her grandmother. A vision quest, with a hallucinated Henry on a motorbike as her spirit guide, leads her straight to Abuela. Hey, while we're on the subject, when did this show turn into Scrubs? Betty's suddenly having a lot of fantasies, J.D.-style, lately – the witch hunt of a couple of weeks ago, last week's knight fight, now this. It's just a little strange, is all, because they never used to go inside her head. Anyway, Abuela's mind is mostly gone, but, in accordance with the Rule of TV Senility, she takes Betty for her long-lost daughter, Mama Suarez, begs for forgiveness, and encourages her to fight for Henry. Well, that's the way Betty hears it. Also, Papa can't go back to the U.S., and someone is looking for revenge on him. Maybe Rosa's first husband isn't really dead?
Back in New York, Bradford loses his damn mind, finds it again, and then loses it again when he signs the divorce papers. Idiot. Why would you want to/not be scared to divorce Claire? A pill-popping, manic Daniel spends the episode jumping on the office furniture, demanding high fives, and putting the moves on Rebecca Gayheart, Alex's ex-girlfriend. And, hey, Medicated Daniel is a lot of fun. I mean, don't do drugs, kids, of course, but all that energy really makes a difference, for the better. But then there's a drug deal that goes bad, just in case you were thinking about doing drugs. Which you shouldn't. And then there's Marc and Amanda, who I just find myself loving more and more every week. Why? This week, Marc is horrified by Amanda's relationship, and tells her she deserves more than a seeeeecret boyfriend who treats her like dirt in public. So Marc defends her, and outs – ins – whatever – Tavares, but they don't really hurt him until Amanda shows off his ugly, ugly buttons. It's like a Fashion Justice League. It's awesome. And then they find the love dungeon! Is there anything these two can't do? By the way, the love dungeon still scares me. After the revelations we've previously had about Bradford's sexual preferences, I'm not looking forward to seeing what's inside.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
They Are Women, Hear Them Dork
With the '06-'07 season drawing swiftly to a close, I'm ready to declare it the Season of the Nerdy Woman. In addition to the elevation of preexisting nerd Cindy "Mac" Mackenzie to the main credits of Veronica Mars, this season added two more female nerds to the roster: Betty Suarez and Liz Lemon. (One of the other members of the club, Chloe O'Brian, got a stupid never-ending ex storyline, but you can't have everything.) In fact, the two new geeks on the block are the stars of their respective shows, and while they ostensibly serve as the sane centers around which all the zaniness of Mode and TGS revolve, they're still able to dork out in their own unique ways. And it's a large part of what makes them interesting, engaging characters, and makes their shows even more fun to watch. 30 Rock allowed Liz to get geekier as time went on, and I don't think it's a coincidence that the show became more appealing at the same time. Anyone who can swear by the hammer of Thor in her everyday life is a) not someone you see on TV all the time, and b) someone you should be seeing more of. Besides, there's a huge, underrepresented group of nerdy women out there and, speaking as part of this group, I'm pleased that we're getting some serious role models on TV.
Friday, May 04, 2007
Ugly Betty: Chivalry is Giant Q-Tips
So many great moments in this episode. Amanda's acting reel, Marc and Amanda's running "Hi, Grandma" joke (and their rhyming banter), everything Deputy Leo does, and, of course, "no touching." Because, really, what's a parent-child scene in a prison without a "no touching" reference?
So, as promised last week, Betty and the other assistants, as well as Henry and Christina, go to "The Middle Ages," and let's not kid ourselves. We all know what it is, and we've all been there. (Admit it.) There, Betty attempts to win a thousand dollars riding a mechanical bull, and Deputy Leo gets his dink on so Henry can defend his not-girlfriend's honor in an American Gladiators-type joust. Naturally, he gets the snot beat out of him, because that's the Henry we know and love. And when he confesses his love to Betty, of course Charlie is standing right there. But she still doesn't break up with him. Look, Charlie, I understand. Henry is mad cute. But seriously, when your boyfriend chooses to spend his time with another woman, fighting for her with giant Q-tips and making puppy eyes at her, it's probably time to break up with him.
Meanwhile, I am very disappointed in Claire. I would have thought that by now, she would have her own gang in prison, and be ruling the other inmates and the guards through her patented icy disdain. Instead, all she's scored is toilet wine and a beating from a beefy inmate. And while Wilhelmina does get a beating in this episode, it's not on Claire's orders. It's Marc, acting on Wil's orders, so she can pin it on Claire and wangle a divorce out of Bradford. Come on, Claire, if you're going to get blamed for a beating, you might as well do it. What's happened to you in prison?
Oh, and, good news: Daniel is trying to get over his sex addiction. Bad news: he's getting off his sex addiction by popping pills. Which means he's going to be the new, caneless, non-covertly British, sex-addicted House. In other words, the less fun House.
Friday, April 27, 2007
Ugly Betty: No Comeuppance!
I told you they'd get back together. Halfway through this episode, Betty and Daniel are apologizing to each other and talking about how important their friendship is – and then Betty starts with the lecturing. Yay, they're back! Daniel's in trouble over the fallout from last week's statutory rape, and almost has to resign from Mode, but Betty saves the day, with an assist from a purse-snatching Henry. Ah, Henry – it's been too long, my friend. The two of them prove that Petra is actually 20. Daniel's so relieved that he immediately goes to have more indiscriminate sex, over Betty's protests, because he will never get his comeuppance, you hear? Don't worry about it, Betty; just book him a trip to the Amazon and hope for a repeat of last night's Grey's Anatomy. That oughta straighten him out. Sidebar: how cool were Petra and her mom/sister, anyway? I'm sorry that their storyline is over so soon. I could watch Petra's momster smack around Petra and Daniel all day.
What is with this Alexis/Bradford relationship? Last week Alexis discovered that her dad missed her and loved her, and this week Bradford's willing to offer her $10 million to get lost and pay off a Brazilian guy to seduce her away. I suppose the two aren't mutually exclusive, but still. Same with Alexis and Daniel – one week they're playing nice together, this week Alexis is cruelly using him in her game against Bradford. It's all so confusing! I never know what's going on!
In the Suarez household, a couple of things happen: Hilda gets engaged (yes, to Santos), and Papa's getting sent back to Mexico. And if this ends up anything like My Name Is Earl, someone is going to have to cross the field of rakes to get him back. I nominate Justin; he's got little feet.
By the way, next week looks awesome. Claire returns to shiv Wilhelmina a new one, and everyone else goes to Medieval Times, unless I dreamed it, which is entirely possible. If I did: best dream ever!
Friday, April 20, 2007
Ugly Betty: There's a Party in the Love Dungeon, and I Don't Want to be Invited
This week: everyone wants to find Fey's love dungeon. (This show, sometimes: so far over the top that the top is a dot to them.) Alexis wants to find it to locate Fey's most recent diaries, to fulfill everyone's hopes and free Claire. Because she hasn't done it yet, the lazy slattern. Free Claire! Wilhelmina wants to find it to get some clue as to how best to seduce Bradford. The answer: feet. Man, I knew that Wilhelmina trying to seduce Bradford would be awful, but I never anticipated foot seduction. Blurg. And Amanda – well, she just wants to show up Deputy Leo, who's been run out of Neptune by Keith and has now taken a job as Alexis' assistant. None of them finds the love dungeon, but we do. Oh, goody. You know, I really wanted to be the one to find it. Perhaps we can have more foot seduction, too.
Yeah, so you remember how Constance the Crazy Case Worker was crazy? Girl still crazy, and after a bout of normalcy – the eye of the crazy storm, if you will – kidnaps Papa Suarez and threatens to marry him. Oh, and also, she was totally fired two months ago for being crazy. So Hilda warns Papa, he tries to escape, but Constance steals his cell and forces him into a hideous powder-blue tux, and everything builds up to a big crazy head – until we discover Why Constance is Crazy. Yes, break out the tinkly piano music, because poor Constance gets forgotten by her charges as soon as they become citizens, and just once she wants someone to remember her. Oh, come on. All these weeks of crazitude and they slap a sad little bow on it and expect us to go "aww"? I hate it when this show goes all Full House on us.
In things that are actually sad: Betty and Daniel break up! Daniel's tired of being taken care of by Betty, and he tells her, despite all evidence, ever, to the contrary, that her job ends when she leaves the office. So when he calls looking for help with the statutory rape and blackmail he just got himself into (…yeah), Betty won't talk to him and Daniel is left to give himself an internal uh-oh five. Oh, she'll just go back to him right away. They have the second best relationship on the show - after Marc and Amanda but before Marc and Wilhelmina - and it would be tragic to lose it.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Judith Light: Yes, Still Awesome
I've devoted a lot of bandwidth in this blog to how awesome Judith Light is on Ugly Betty. And if you are not part of the choir that I am preaching to, then you're just not an Ugly Betty fan. But the fact is that Judith Light is awesome wherever she goes, including Law and Order: SVU. SVU is like my TV comfort food. If I just feel like chilling on the couch, I turn on SVU, because there's a fifty-fifty chance, at any given time, that USA is airing an SVU repeat. It's formulaic and I know exactly what I'm getting, which is what makes it good comfort TV, but occasionally the show is enlivened by Judith, in her recurring role as Judge Donnelly. Like all the judge roles, it's not one with a lot of pizzazz or drama. She shows up, makes rulings, and is generally dismissive toward the lawyers. But where a lesser actress would deliver her lines, call it a job well done and go home, Judith works the bits that she's given. Her best line of this week's episode: "Up my butt?" Not the line itself, in response to a web video of drunken teens making fun of her, but the way Judith delivers it. 49% disbelief, 47% "those kids' asses are mine," and 4% "and so are their large quantities of alcohol." (I like to think that she takes a bit of Claire Meade with her wherever she goes.)
Friday, March 23, 2007
Ugly Betty: Marc's Very Own Episode
Okay, so you remember how in the Thanksgiving episode, Marc was going home to tell his family about his girlfriend who lives in Canada? Apparently, the role of Alberta was played, for three years, by Amanda, and Marc had to break up with her to avoid all the talk about marriage. This week, with his mom in town, Marc has to find a new pretend girlfriend, and Amanda, still miffed about getting dumped, foists Betty on him. And has Mama Weiner met Marc? On a flaming scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being the gentle smolder of a George Takei and 10 being the towering inferno of a Carson Kressley, Marc is maybe a 9. Maybe Mama Weiner is from Ohio, where, according to Studio 60, all the clueless, culturally illiterate, closeminded parents hang out. So, as you'd expect, Marc and Betty get to know each other, strike up an alliance of sorts, have the world's second most awkward dinner (after this one), and Marc finally comes out to his mom. Who is mean, and can't deal with it. And sure, this subplot is as old as dirt, but it's both hysterical and heartbreaking, because all the assistants are in rare form - especially Marc. This is his episode, and he's already putting up curtains and rearranging the furniture, because he owns it. Don't worry about your mom, Marc – I'm sure my mom would love to adopt you.
In the ostensible main plot, there is yet another power struggle between Daniel, Alexis, and Wilhelmina, and Judith Light, handcuffed to a hospital bed, runs circles around all of them. She tries to force Daniel and Alexis to work together, and then delivers a forceful, albeit verbal, bitchslap to Wilhelmina. Because even when Claire is physically restrained, you don't mess with her. But Wil has not mastered this simple rule. After Claire says that no one but a Meade will run Mode, Wil sets out to seduce Bradford. You know this isn't going to end well, right, Wilhelmina? Claire will destroy you. Finally, Daniel closes the episode with a voiceover/montage about family, which is at least less vague than the summation you get in any given episode of Grey's Anatomy or Desperate Housewives, but that doesn't really help when I'm already so tired of the episode-ending voiceover summation. Hey, Ugly Betty, if Grey's Anatomy jumped off a bridge, would you do it, too?
Meanwhile, I think I'm going to order one of those "Free Claire" shirts from Justin.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
ABC Gets an Early Start
Nothing wrong with a network picking up its shows early. ABC has already locked in 11 shows for next season, which means that we can cross Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy, Lost, and Desperate Housewives off our list of shows to watch out for come upfronts - if they were ever on the list, that is. And it's good news for Men in Trees fans, who I assume must exist somewhere, even though I personally have never met one (hello, MiT fan, and how are you?), because their show is coming back too. Oh, and don't worry, Liz: so is Boston Legal.
Friday, March 16, 2007
Ugly Betty: Hey, That One Show Is Back!
Welcome back! It seems like forever since we've had a new episode, doesn't it? I blame Meredith. She dies and the whole ABC schedule suffers for it. But it's not like we've missed anything over the break. Betty is still pining for Henry, Lucy Liu is still cheating on Bender with Daniel, Wilhelmina is still plotting to take over Mode, Constance the Case Worker is still nuts, Claire is still the queen of all murderous lushes, and Alexis still really hates Bradford. The only person who's done anything different while on break is Charlie, who's turned herself into a hippie-dippy astrologer/part-time cake hater. They must really be trying to get us to hate her, because who doesn't like cake, and I don't even know what she was saying with that whole purple moon-color couch jibber-jabber, but it sounded annoying. And whatever happened to the whole "hey, she's not so bad, and she and Betty seem to get along" thing? That lasted all of five minutes. But it's all kind of moot, now that Claire has helped Betty see that she's on the road to cutting Charlie's brake lines and toasting marshmallows on the burning wreck of her car if she doesn't do something – so Betty cuts Henry out of her life. And, yes, it's sad, but it's not like it's going to cut down on all the longing looks. Hey, at least her orthodontist is sweet, and it's nice to see that guy get work after The Class. (Yes, I know it's not technically cancelled.)
Meanwhile, everyone finds out about Claire's murderous secret. Lucy Liu finds out, but is confident that she can defend her, Alexis finds out after having driven Lucy away, and then the police find out, because Claire tells them. Naturally, they haul her off to jail, and for me, it's bittersweet. I don't want to see Judith Light go, but as Claire nearly hands Constance the Case Worker's ass to her earlier in the episode, I can bid her goodbye knowing that she'll be just fine in prison. Next time we see her, she'll have a gang.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Miscellaneous Show Updates
Law & Order: The granddaddy of NBC shows, the Jerry Orbach to the rest of the network's... parade of younger detectives that Briscoe worked with (Chris Noth? Jesse L. Martin?), may finally be retiring after 17 seasons. And, really, it's time. The show is already older than some American Idol contestants. I can't even remember TV without it. (I do, however, remember TV without Vincent D'Onofrio, and I would like to reexperience that.) But, you know, it'll never really be gone - not as long as TNT still shows 47 episodes per day. That chung-chung sound is never going away.
Scrubs: Definitely coming back for a seventh season - hooray! The only question is which network it'll be on. I'm half hoping that ABC will pick it up instead, because I have to believe that ABC will treat it better than NBC, which is moving Scrubs around, again.
The Amazing Race: Rob and Amber claim in an interview that Charla and Mirna spent twenty minutes searching for the clue after Amber's infamous lie. Hee hee heeeee! I'm sorry, that was mean. Anyway, I have to actually agree with Rob (I know!) that Colin and Christie would have made a great All-Star team, much better than the cousins. They're actually good racers, and it's not like Colin won't bring the drama. His ox is broken!
Heroes: Plenty of tantalizing tidbits from the panel discussion at the Paley Festival, including a Justice League/Super Best Friends-type thing that Linderman was once part of. And the burning question comes up again, courtesy of Hayden Panettiere: Why isn't Greg Grunberg in a comedy? Girl, seriously.
Ugly Betty: Thank you, Vanessa Williams, for yelling "Marc!" so much.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Ugly Betty: Charlie, You Two-Timing Skank
So you remember how last week Henry had a girlfriend? It's Charlie from Heroes, whose name here is – well, Charlie. At least we don't have to learn a new name. However, it has the unintended consequence of making me expect to see Hiro at any moment, showing up, all, "Charlie! You said you were dead!" while Ando hits on Amanda. Charlie's pretty cool – Bettyish, in fact, so we know Henry has a type – and Betty befriends her. That is, right up until she's possessed by the spirit of Amanda (you kind of had to be there) and she ditches Charlie in the subway. And then she tells Henry she has a crush on him, and they almost kiss, but why put them together now when they can stretch it out and frustrate the viewers? They could do this for years! Like Gilmore Girls! It worked out great for them! I know it's only the beginning of the Betty/Henry tango, but it feels like it's been going on forever. Probably because I spent so much time yelling at the TV over Walter, and now I'm doing it again over Henry, so it all kind of blurs together into one long frustrating… gah! Yeah, I think I'm going to have to get used to this sort of thing.
Marc and Christina, meanwhile, team up to Project Runway a dress out of magazines and bubble wrap, and Sarah Jessica Parker's fashion choices are not questionable enough that she would wear that to the Oscars. I don't think Lara Flynn Boyle would wear it, to be honest. But, hey, it would have made a good showing in the recycling challenge. And that was a hilarious dressmaking montage. You just can't go wrong when you pair up Marc and Christina, although I really miss all their snide carping at each other. It was so much fun!
There's some guest star action this week: Jerry O'Connell goes the "Brad Pitt on Friends" route and shows up to be a jerk to his real-life fiancee, and Daniel gets up to some shenanigans with Lucy Liu (Lucy! What about Bender?), but the important part is that he finally believes that Claire killed Fey. And now Claire says that she's going to turn herself in! Nooooo, don't do it! You've already gotten away with it! Also, they don't have alcohol in prison, and I fear that at least half of your magnificence is because of the booze.
Oh, and you may think that you've seen cute, but unless you saw Justin perform Hairspray as a one-boy show, you don't know what cute is.
Friday, February 09, 2007
Ugly Betty: Claire Meade Is My Drunken TV Mom
Last week, I asked what Alexis' problem was, and Ugly Betty has delivered a quick response. Her problem is that Bradford not only opposed Alex's decision to become a woman, but threatened that he would lose everything and openly wished that his son was dead. Okay, I can understand the bitterness. But it doesn't mean I'm completely sold on Alexis, as some of the "funny" Meade family memories were fairly disturbing. For one thing, young Alex shoved Daniel off a boat into freezing cold water, causing him to lose a toe, and then there's the whole wetting the bed until he was 15 thing. Isn't that one of the signs of a potential serial killer? So, yeah, Ugly Betty, while I no longer question Alexis' motives, now I think that she's going to kill Daniel and bury him in a shallow grave. The best part of all this Meade family drama: Judith Light is back as the brilliantly sarcastic, drunken ice queen of a Meade matriarch, Claire, and the day she spends with Betty at the spa is exactly as hilarious as you would expect it to be. And then she confesses to Fey's murder. Is it wrong that I want her to get away with it? She's just so cool!
And the roster of Team Henry just keeps growing, adding to its ranks the very awesome Claire. She earns herself a standing ovation from me when she tells Betty (re: Walter, of course), "This guy is a pain in the ass, break up with him!" What did I tell you? So cool! Even Walter isn't on Team Walter anymore, because he can see the breakup coming. So he lets Betty go and moves to Maryland. This means that Betty can get with Henry, right? Right? Well, it would, except that the most integral part of Team Henry isn't on the team anymore. His ex-girlfriend is in town, and Henry's going to try to make it work with her. Noooooooooo! Damn you, Ugly Betty, I should have known you would do this to me! I mean Betty! Oh, screw it, I mean me.
