Leopold is still smart, and Conrad's past is still coming back to haunt him. But what I find most perplexing is this subplot with Knapp and the lighter-flicking inmate, the one who looks like Bill Gates. Bill seems to be in charge of providing Knapp's backstory bit by bit, because he tells us that he kidnapped his own sister and Knapp never found her (which clearly haunts him), and that Knapp left the FBI due to "mental exhaustion." Which, coincidentally, is what I'm getting from Bill. He talks in circles, never getting to the point, and mysteriously knows a lot. I think he might be trying to do "criminal genius," but it comes off more like "irritating little brother."
Remember how I told you last week that Aubrey wasn't as smart as her brother? Yeah, she's also a complete brat. She can't understand why her parents have to act like nothing's wrong, and she complains about them constantly and speculates that she's adopted. She tells her stoner friend about the kidnapping and he tells his friend, who goes on to threaten Ellie at the party. And she's snide to the very cool Agent Atkins. However, it's that very special kind of snide that, combined with some other incidents, including a half-naked one, makes it clear the writers are trying to set up some sort of flirtation between them. That is... the only words I have to adequately express my thoughts about that are "not cool." Not only is it completely inappropriate, but Aubrey spends the entire episode acting like a spoiled child, and not even Bill deserves to be saddled with that.
Also? Atkins can teleport. Just like Hiro. I'm serious. One scene, he's in the Cains' apartment, being snotted at by Aubrey and tasked with taking her to Barney's. Two seconds later, he's in a briefing at the FBI. Either the continuity guys are slacking off, or Atkins can teleport. And since I like Atkins, I'm going with the teleporation angle.
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Kidnapped: Not cool, you guys
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Kidnapped: Ph34r |{n4pp'$ 1337 $|{i11z!
OMG Kn4pp is teh r0XX0rz!!1!!!11! Always one step ahead of the feds! Gets midnight calls from cryptic convicts resembling Bill Gates! Knows that the feds know that he knows they're watching him! He even knows 1337! Although, to be fair, it's not that hard to figure out. Ask Colleen about the time when I cracked her complicated 1337 code simply by reading it.
There's more kidnapping this week, as the Cains' older daughter, Aubrey, also becomes a hostage. Aubrey may not be as smart as Leopold - she basically thinks she's on an extended hook-up until she finds the surveillance pictures in her boy toy Kenny's car - but she can also hold her breath under water for a long time. I'm telling you now, there had better be some payoff. I really hope the show is not just doing it because it looks cool to have the actors staring up through the water and then suddenly surfacing. Anyway, Kenny's clearly in the employ of the Cooler King, but he also has connections to Conrad. For you see, Conrad came from Queens, and, as Kenny tells Aubrey before he is (of course) interrupted, "Connie forgot where he came from."
The feds come very close to ruining everything again when Knapp corners Kenny; all those FBI cars screeching up puts poor Kenny on edge and he holds Aubrey at gunpoint. But Atkins from Anchorage singlehandedly saves the entire Bureau's reputation (or just has a bit of dumb luck) by shooting Kenny in the neck. Yes, he killed Kenny. But I actually like him, so I'm not going to call him a bastard.
And Leopold breaks out! I told you he was no Kim. More of a Michelle. Unfortunately, he's in Mexico, and the gangs outside may be worse than the kidnappers inside.
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Kidnapped: Nope, no idiots here... except for the feds, of course
Twenty minutes of Kidnapped was enough to convince me that this is a good show. We get the brazen daylight kidnapping of teenager Leopold (he refuses to be called "Leo" because he thinks it's an old man's name, to which I say: Leopold?). We get to meet the mastermind behind the kidnapping, who likes to do his Cooler King impression. We meet Latimer King, an FBI agent in his last week on the job, and Knapp, a freelancer who specializes in bringing home kidnap victims, as he's rescuing the daughter of another client.
On paper, it sounds like everything you've seen before - the law enforcement officer dragged out of retirement for one last job, the rogue agent locking horns with the feds (who, of course, screw everything up) - but it works. Mostly because everyone is smart. King and Knapp are smart, the Cooler King is smart (he eliminates his minions as soon as he's done with them), and, best of all, Leopold is smart. He steals a plastic knife, hides his meds, and can hold his breath a long time underwater - which I assume will pay off later. He's no Kim, is what I'm saying. I want to see what's going to happen with him.
