Whatever He's Selling, I'll Buy

First, there are the bizarre commercials for this company that the Idol contestants are contractually press-ganged into each week. (I'm sure I don't need to tell you the name of the company, because if you watch American Idol, these commercials already haunt your dreams, or possibly your nightmares.) Then, there's the commercial directed by David Mamet that premiered last night. Yes, you read that right. But as far as I'm concerned, the most effective commercials that the company has are the ones starring Mike Rowe. I'm not part of their target audience – at all – but whenever Mike starts talking about a fully boxed spring, I'm all, "Ooh, fully boxed spring!" even though I have no idea what it is, why I would want it, or what would happen to me if my spring was not fully boxed. (Mike seems to think it would be something bad.) All I know is that Mike is awesome, and that I should do whatever he says, because Mike Rowe would never steer me wrong. This is why I have five trucks. Darn you, Mike!