Ugly Betty: Claire Meade Is My Drunken TV Mom

Last week, I asked what Alexis' problem was, and Ugly Betty has delivered a quick response. Her problem is that Bradford not only opposed Alex's decision to become a woman, but threatened that he would lose everything and openly wished that his son was dead. Okay, I can understand the bitterness. But it doesn't mean I'm completely sold on Alexis, as some of the "funny" Meade family memories were fairly disturbing. For one thing, young Alex shoved Daniel off a boat into freezing cold water, causing him to lose a toe, and then there's the whole wetting the bed until he was 15 thing. Isn't that one of the signs of a potential serial killer? So, yeah, Ugly Betty, while I no longer question Alexis' motives, now I think that she's going to kill Daniel and bury him in a shallow grave. The best part of all this Meade family drama: Judith Light is back as the brilliantly sarcastic, drunken ice queen of a Meade matriarch, Claire, and the day she spends with Betty at the spa is exactly as hilarious as you would expect it to be. And then she confesses to Fey's murder. Is it wrong that I want her to get away with it? She's just so cool!

And the roster of Team Henry just keeps growing, adding to its ranks the very awesome Claire. She earns herself a standing ovation from me when she tells Betty (re: Walter, of course), "This guy is a pain in the ass, break up with him!" What did I tell you? So cool! Even Walter isn't on Team Walter anymore, because he can see the breakup coming. So he lets Betty go and moves to Maryland. This means that Betty can get with Henry, right? Right? Well, it would, except that the most integral part of Team Henry isn't on the team anymore. His ex-girlfriend is in town, and Henry's going to try to make it work with her. Noooooooooo! Damn you, Ugly Betty, I should have known you would do this to me! I mean Betty! Oh, screw it, I mean me.