Wednesday, January 09, 2008

The Golden Box Awards: Liz's Take on 2007 (Part Two)

Welcome back to the Golden Box Awards! (For the first half, in which the Important Awards were given out, head here.) Let's get this show on the road, shall we?

Most Improved: Desperate Housewives. With the addition of the brilliant Dana Delaney (and the intriguing mystery she brings with her), Desperate Housewives is right back on track this season, after losing its way (to put it kindly) in its second and third years.

Best Show You're Not Watching: Frisky Dingo. Yeah, it's a cartoon. Yeah, each episode is 11 minutes long. But it's insanely hilarious, incredibly quotable, and rewards repeat viewers in the same way Arrested Development did, with impressively elaborate running jokes, and jokes set up several episodes in advance. Seriously, watch it. New second season episodes finally return March 2nd on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim (so keep an eye out for marathons, since you really have to watch it from the beginning), and the DVD of the first season will be out March 25th.

Best Sidekick: Sam Axe, Burn Notice. Bruce Freaking Campbell, people. BRUCE CAMPBELL! Also, Sam totally kicks ass.

Most Deserving of a Kick in the Teeth: The Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers (AMPTP). For obvious reasons.

Most Testing of Fan Loyalty: America's Next Top Model/Tyra Banks. If you're going to fix the results of your reality show to promote (poorly-named) outside projects, you should probably make sure that the winner is a) deserving, and b) qualified to compete on the show in the first place, ethically and contractually. Also, you should make sure that there isn't any incriminating evidence out there.

The Arrested Development Memorial Award for 'Tragically Premature Cancellation': Veronica Mars, of course. And its cancellation became even more tragic when I saw the awesome season four pitch, a Hail Mary pass by Rob Thomas in which Veronica was a junior FBI agent. RIP, Veronica Mars. You suck, CW (see above award for more evidence).

The Janice Dickinson Award for 'Craziest Bitch': Paula Abdul. Because, wow. I mean, just, WOW. Who knew her crazy well ran that deep? (And, more mysteriously, who knew it would make for such boring television?)

The Harsh Realm Memorial Award for 'Biggest Disappointment': Studio 60. Amazing cast, Aaron Sorkin, great guest stars, Aaron Sorkin, Tommy Schlamme, Aaron Sorkin... And yet, well...let's not revisit the past. Let's just sit quietly for a moment and reflect on the damage one man's ego can do to what should have been (and began as) a brilliant piece of television.

And that's it for the Golden Boxes this year! Here's hoping 2008 brings a speedy and fair resolution to the writers' strike, and more great television for us to talk about!