House: Let me see that thong tha thong thong thong

Willkommen, bienvenue and welcome to my House recap! (Yes, I love Joel Grey and Cabaret, and I'm not at all ashamed to admit it.) Apologies if this is a little incoherent...I have a cold and am somewhat fuzzy-headed. Maybe I should ask House to put me out of my misery, for yes, that is our theme this week. Poor, poor Joel Grey is a famous medical researcher stricken with a mystery illness who wants House to help him OD on morphine.

Unfortunately for Joel Grey, that's totally illegal in New Jersey, so House makes him think he's getting the morphine, but puts him in a coma instead, all the better to run tons of tests on him against his will. Cameron's not game with the killing him plan OR the coma plan (I guess she's on Team "Let Him Die in Pain"), but has a quality chat with Joel Grey once they wake him up again about an old study of his that House brought to her attention. Apparently, he irradiated babies without their mothers' consent because patients' rights hold back research. Charming. And yeah, Cameron's not too pleased with him.

House, meanwhile, gets his flirt on with a patient's 17 1/2 year old daughter, who is hitting on him like crazy. Inspired by her red thong (and dude--how tacky is being able to see someone's thong coming up out of their pants?), House figures out what's wrong with Joel Grey. Unfortunately, it's terminal. The next morning, he's dead, and Cuddy suspects House of playing the angel of death. But no! It was Cameron! Murderess!!! (Okay, consensual mercy killing, but still...you know she just wanted to kill the baby-poisoner.) House is proud of her, though, so I guess her evil plan worked.

Oh, right, and House is back on the cane and is, well, House again. Sweetness.

QuOTE: "I hate practicing medicine in high school." --House, upon hearing that Cameron told Wilson how Joel Grey was doing. (Truer words were never spoken.)