Monday, November 13, 2006

The Amazing Race: First Five Teams May Get Muddy

Finland, Finland, Finland! The country where the teams want to be. Its mountains so lofty, its treetops so tall. But first the teams have to get there. You will not be surprised to learn that the beauty queens bring out their map again to educate the airline ticketers about geography. I would, however, be surprised if they pointed to the correct country, because they were asking earlier if Finland was the country where they wear wooden shoes. Remember the song, ladies: so near to Russia, so far from Japan. It's the country with the president who looks like Conan O'Brien. You know, that one.

Upon their successful arrival in Finland, the teams are sent out into the countryside for a muddy Detour, introduced by Phil as he is waist-deep in mud and wearing waders. The teams can either run a muddy cross-country skiing course or a muddy obstacle course, and why they didn't have Phil actually run one of those is beyond me. If Phil is just going to stand in the mud, then he may as well be replaced with the Travelocity gnome. Anyway, one part of the obstacle course requires a team member to carry the other, which sparks a moment later on that is both funny and kind of sad. Rob enthuses that he didn't think he could carry Kimberly as easily as he was able to, and Kimberly instantly assumes that he thinks she's fat. Because they really are that couple. They're the bickering, "does this make me look fat" couple you thought didn't exist outside of cliché. You were wrong.

The Roadblock takes them down into a limestone mine to retrieve a block of limestone with a clue in it. Certainly David would have felt right at home here, although I'm sure the limestone mines are a bit roomier than what he would be used to. Incidentally, the remaining members of the Six Pack are mourning their fallen comrades by wearing their clothes; Karlyn has David's U of K hat and the Chos have their "Friends in Low Places" shirts. And Godwin, while going down into the mine, calls on David for help. He's not dead, you know. Sadly, the Chos don't realize that they are now the only people in their alliance, because they keep complaining about Lyn and Karlyn not waiting for them. There are five teams left; it's about time to stop helping other teams, especially when, as they do, they always end up in the back of the pack.

At the Olympic stadium in Helsinki, the teams are instructed to do a face-first rappel down a tower (pictured, and very tall), and if you were looking at your clock at this point, here's where you realized that there would be no pit stop in this episode. And you'd be right, because it's a two-parter. We leave off with Tyler and James just having finished the rappel, Dustin and Kandice about to start, the Chos and Lyn and Karlyn having found the right way to go, and Rob and Kimberly running around the stadium lost and frantic.

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